What would you do if you treated your body kindly? I ask this question to clients, colleagues, friends, loved ones, and anyone who is willing to reflect on it. From the answers, I realized two interesting things. Firstly, everyone intuitively understands what it means to take care of their body. Secondly, deep down, people dream of being happy and healthy, even if they assure that they eat vegetables and work out for a beautiful figure. People often and wrongly judge health or its absence based on external signs. But it is measured not only by physical, but also by emotional parameters, and appearance has nothing to do with it. You can be healthy with cellulite, plump thighs, and a substantial behind. People usually mean “health and happiness” under “good health.” In turn, its secret lies in loving yourself and developing healthy habits. Has the last condition left you feeling downhearted? Well, it’s not surprising. Every time someone from clients sends me an article with a headline like “Eggs are just as harmful as smoking” or says they are trying a new detox program, have quit gluten for the post, or gone on a paleo diet, I realize the world has gone crazy. All these people are asking how to overcome the urge to eat junk food without looking ridiculous. Attempting to live by the rules tires one out. My acquaintances should drink a sedative or, even better, practice yoga or just take a deep breath. You don’t have to go to extremes to be healthy. Don’t torment yourself with diets or “clean eating.” Don’t ruin your life in the hope of someday becoming healthier and happier! You can come to this without strict limitations. The only thing you need is to have sympathy for your body. I mean not another set of rules, but a soft mindset based on the belief that health starts with self-care. You will be able to tune your “inner compass” to what is useful and what you want most of all. The main question in self-care is “Will it help me feel better?” And if the answer is yes, then it’s worth it.
Health “grows” from love. The basis of body care lies in the desire to love oneself. Even if you would like to look differently, even if you have a bad day and you hate your arms, belly, chest, legs, buttocks, nose or anything else, you can express love for yourself in every choice you make.
Love and relationships are the cornerstone of our emotional well-being and happiness. They bring meaning and purpose to our lives and provide a sense of security and comfort. Love can be defined in many ways, but at its core, it is a deep and unconditional connection between two people.
To win trust, you must show your body that you care for it. You are like motivating it: “I always remember about you: after all, we’re in this together!” Building trust in a relationship requires constant effort and attention. You need to show your partner that you care about them and their needs.
Awareness of one’s not-so-good body relationship: usually an awkward moment. Clients freeze with such an expression on their face, as if they saw their child being teased on the playground. In the exclaimed “damn it, it can’t be!” I hear sadness, annoyance, and even anger. I had a client obsessed with dietary rules. She prohibited herself from eating biscuit cookies and thought she was entitled only to dry and tasteless “healthy” baked goods, even though she felt aversion to it deep down. Another client after a red-eye flight rushed to the gym as soon as she landed, despite the grogginess from a restless night and granted time off. She was willing to exhaust herself to burn excess fat after festive meals on a business trip, then tackle the accumulated mail during her absence.
You are free to make your own choice, rather than following meaningless rules. You will stop obsessing and instead focus your energy on something more interesting than food obsession. By doing so, you will be able to lead a more fulfilling life and enjoy the things that truly matter to you.
Stop fighting with your body. Accept it and promise to live authentically. Instead of focusing on perfection, focus on self-love and self-acceptance. Embrace your unique qualities and characteristics, and live life to the fullest, on your own terms. Remember, you are in control of your own choices and actions.
The kinder you are to your body, the more you will be convinced that you are absolutely right. By becoming the director of your happiness, you will be able to set meaningful goals without worrying about whether they are in trend or not. It’s all about loving yourself and being true to who you are.
Another client assured that she would only be truly happy if she returned to a “acceptable” weight, despite having a loving husband, healthy children, and wonderful friends who loved her just the way she was. She was obsessed with her diet, exercised regularly, and often neglected self-care if it didn’t meet her ideal. During our first meeting, she jokingly said that she doesn’t feel “sexy enough for sex” because during intimate moments, she was haunted by thoughts of her thighs and belly. She laughed, but we both knew that there was pain behind the humor. The women I described, like many others, fell victim to one of the main “cultural myths” of our time: “I will be happier and healthier when I start admiring my reflection in the mirror.” For most people, this means diets, as well as a panic fear of gaining weight or an obsessive desire to change something, such as getting rid of fat deposits, reducing hips or regaining the same figure as before childbirth. Before finally debunking this myth, let’s consider the benefits of taking care of the body.